Friday, June 13, 2008

I Have Nothing to Tat!


DISCLAIMER:
The following post contains
large amounts of

Those of you who find sarcasm to be offensive,
annoying, or otherwise, 'just too silly for words'
should turn away now to avoid a
big misunderstanding.


...and remember...it's not you, it's me....
unless you find this post relates to you, too.

...then it's about you, too!

End of Disclaimer
~


I thought I would tat a heart for a friend of mine. She's been awfully nice driving me around on occasion when needed. Remember this? My car was out of commission; it was totalled. I did not have reliable transportation. This friend, J., she has been really nice. She's listened to me talk about my trials of not having a car and other woes. She's driven me to get groceries, abandoning her husband and bringing her two kids in tow to help me out once a week. I asked her if she'd like something tatted. I figured it was the least I could do since I cannot actually repay her. I was surprised when her eyes actually lit up! I thought I would at least get a forced look of 'being pleased' but no, it was a spontaneous sincere lighting up of the eyes. So, I said, "Would you like a heart? I'll tat you a heart, that way you can frame it if you'd like. It'll be a nice symbol of frienship!" She agreed.


But you see, I have a bit of a problem.
I have nothing to tat today.


...see....NOTHING!


No books...


One hundred fifty and counting....and this isn't all of them...


no patterns...


My private collection of personal patterns ( some of which I've designed and others I've printed from the internet).
See how empty the box is?



I certainly have no books on tatted heart patterns....

See? No books on tatted heart designs, here!

no shuttles...



No plastic tatting shuttles ( bobbin or post)....sigh...


...no metal bobbin tatting shuttles, either.



and worst of all...



NO THREAD...


See my fishing tackle box? EMPTY!




Since I have no thread I said to my friend, "What color would you like?"

To my utter dismay she said "Oooohhhh, WHITE! Yes, isn't that the usual color for lace?"

I said, "Well, that certainly is a common color, are you SURE you wouldn't like another color?"

She said, "Oh, no, white."

"Okay." I said, smiling all the while. "White it is."



The worst of it is...

I have no white thread!

See how I lack in white thread?


What is a girl to do? With no tatting books, patterns, shuttles, or thread...LOL?
I just might have to go buy a shuttle or two or three or four because I just don't have ENOUGH!
I'll probably have toss some thread in the shopping cart, since as you can see I don't have ENOUGH!

ALWAYS room for more...more...MORE!!! BWAH-HA hA Ha hA


Does anyone else have this problem?

If you relate to this at all, how do you store
all that tatting stuff that you can't get enough of?




Thank you for visiting TattingChic...a little blog about nothing. If you tat maybe you can relate to this. If you don't tat, maybe you have a hobby of some sort that you just can't get ENOUGH of! Isn't it great? All that stuff that you would probably need two lifetimes to tat all of it up, or scrapbook it all up, or quilt, or rubberstamp or acrylic stamp or make enough cards of or......you get the idea.




Or maybe you're just a hoarder for hoarders sake, in which case, and I mean this in the nicest possible way, I think there might be a special medication for you. At least there's some specialists who can help you haul all that junk away and help get you organized and you can have your life back.


As for me and my tatting stash...



...don't even THINK about hauling it away!!!




If you leave a totally appropriate comment at the end of this post, then know, just know, it will be loved and appreciated in a totally appropriate manner.

60 absolutely fabulous things were said:

La Belette Rouge said...

I enjoy a little sarcasm. And, wow you really are under prepared to tat. You have as little tat stuff as I do shoes. I think we both need to go shopping. Poor us.;-)

p.s. I wonder if anyone has ever gotten a tattoo of tatting?

TattingChic said...

Hello, La Balette Rouge, Oh, wow, let's not even get started about shoes...love 'em. The thing about shoes is that you NEED shoes (at least one or two or three pairs, right?). I think a little shopping is in order.
As far as tatting some tatting on one's arm or wherever else, I'll bet it's been done. Everything else under the sun has...LOL.

Sarah said...

I don't think you have enough selection to tat with. I really think you should call your friend up and ask her to take you to the craft store. Get some more white thread!!! Too funny. Don't we all do that. I was just at Michaels last night browsing...buying more paper craft stuff....why, I ask, why???? Also....I find it so interesting that you tat. I am not able to swap with you anytime soon but maybe toward the end of summer I would love to make you something in exchange for a tatted heart....in creamy white!
Sarah
http://vintagelily.typepad.com/my_weblog/

Tattycat said...

You poor, poor dear. I had no idea you were so depraved, I mean deprived!!! I'm going to change your name to "Old Mother Hubbard" as you cubbards are certainly bare. Sarcasm ranks high with me. Probably too high for my own good. It can turn to down right smart alecky if I'm not careful. Give me a little time and I'll make you pictures of how I store all of the things that I don't have enough of! Thanks for the laugh. Now, as to this tattoo comment. I have never thought of wanting a tattoo, but humm......... That's about the only tatting thing I don't have!

Lace-lovin' Librarian - Diane said...

I feel your pain! As I'm looking at the bags of supplies that I've taken out of my closet, I realize it's no wonder that I can't get anything done! I'd take a picture, but I can't find the camera right now. I've been organizing my necessary materials and I'm up to 5 tall kitchen garbage bags of fabric, 3 bags of acrylic yarn, 1 bag of sock yarn, 2 bags of UFOs, 1 bag of yarn I just know I'll use some day, a basket filled with flannel for 32 baby blankets, and I've only cleared out half the closet!

Rosemary said...

Very funny!!
Thanks for visiting me today.
Have a great weekend!
Rosemary

TattingChic said...

Sarah from Vintage Lily, your comment made me laugh out loud. I'm spelling that out for emPHASis. I love your artwork and your blog, thank you for visiting. Let's definately talk swap once you get settled from your move.

Hi TattyCat! Yes, I am a depraved...oopsy...deprived tatter. I'd love to see your tatting depravity...oopsy...deprived-ness on your blog too; when you get the chance.

Awwwww.....shucks, Diane, you can't find the cam? Maybe it's under one of your 5 sacks of very necessary crafting stash? I wanna pic...I wanna see how much tatting stash you've got, too. Come on...I wanna see. Yes, I'm whining...LOL
:)

Hi, Rosemary, always a pleasure to have you stop by. Thanks for the comment.

Pamela said...

Tatting Chic I would love to say that I enjoyed seeing your stash but you own so little that there was nothing much to see... or comment on.

Thanks for the laugh! You have my sympathy/empathy.

Charmingdesigns said...

I relate, I relate...I have more wool then I know what to do with...oh ya...I guess I need to get started on some more birdies.lol...oh, and paints...its always good to have 3 or 4 of the same color. I relate.lol. Laurei

The Scarlett Rose Garden said...

Hee! What a fun post. Enough is never enough!
I wish all of my severely eclectic hoarded stash was as nicely organized as your "lack" of tatting supplies!
I hope that once you DO find a heart pattern and BUY some white thread that you'll show us the heart you made for your friend!
Thank you for visiting~
Nikki

Rosie's Whimsy said...

Hehehe ....... I have not learned to tat, yet! I will, Yes I will!

But my hubby wonders why I need to got to the fabric store for fabric and thread...because I have a "project" I'm thinking about .... when my sewing room is stuffed with said items just waiting for projects!

Sigh...... Rosie

Hooked on Houses said...

This post made me laugh out loud. What a fun blog! -Julia :-)

TattingChic said...

ROFLOL...Pamela, thanks for nothing...LOL...I'm sorry, but I couldn't resist!

Oh, Laurei of Charming designs. Your birdies that you make are oh, so sweet, too. Who could possibly blame you for having so much wool?
I certainly cannot. LOL!

Nikki, thank you. Organizing is another hobby of mine...LOL...I love collecting organizer things and then organizing my things them, it's so much fun and I promise to get that heart tatted and post it, soon!

Rosie, I would LOVE to see you tatting! Let me know if you need help understanding anything.
That's the wonderful thing about hubbies...they keep their wives from taking over the whole house with crafty stuff...but yet, they just don't understand either, do they? LOL!

Hi Julia from Hooked on Houses! Welcome to my corner of blogger-landia! I'm so glad I could make you laugh out loud. It's feels good to do that doesn't it?

Carol Lawecki said...

Hi TattingChic, I'm so sorry to see that you have no books, no patterns and no thread and shuttles. What's a girl to do??? LOL!!! You're too funny! Thanks for the laugh. It seems to me that no matter how much thread you have, you never have the right color and end up having to buy more. That is what just happened to me. I didn't have a med. peach color. I have light peach and a dark peach, but I wanted to tat an earring in a med. peach. Sooooo, I just got my order from Handy Hands and the peach thread is so pretty. I couldn't stop at just one ball of thread, I had to get another book. I got Tatted Farm Animals. I have been looking for a chicken pattern and there is a rooster, a hen, and a few different patterns of chicks. I can't wait to tat them. Ooooppss... I am rambling on in your post... I will have to add the rest to my blog, in good time. I a just finishing a pair of earrings and will post them soon. Have a great weekend!

LadyShuttleMaker aka MadMadPotter said...

(Wiping tear from eye) This story is heartbreaking....perhaps we should take up tatting donations for you...
It's hard to believe she wants white??? I almost forgot that was still an option for tatting.

TattingChic said...

Hi Carol, Thanks for stopping by. I don't mind the rambling...it's called sharing. See, I think I struck a cord here with a quite a few people today and we're all "sharing" it's like group therapy...only it's FREE!

Yes, Sherry, that is an EXCELLENT idea! Tatting donations for TattingChic...ANYTHING to support the habit...yes!

Edie Marie's Attic said...

I love your post! It doesn't happen just in tatting you know, it spreads like the flu to all crafts, sewing, scrapbooking, crocheting, knitting, decorating etc etc etc! I'm glad I'm not the only one!!
Hugs, Sherry

TattingChic said...

Oh, yes, Sherry, you are absolutely right... since this is a tatting blog I'm sparing you all my rubber stamp stash, my card making/scrapbooking paper stash...my embellishments stash..knitting stash, crochet stash...oh, the list goes on. I once had some young men help me move and they complained that I have "too many hobbies" I laughed...too many hobbies. HA!

Thimbleanna said...

Holy Cow! My friend at work has been trying to get me to try tatting -- I thought one shuttle would do me for a lifetime of projects -- and just a bit of thread. Now I'm really hesitating -- I have too many piles from other hobbies already! I LOVED your sarcasm though and I can sure feel your love for your hobby. Very Cool!!!

TattingChic said...

Seriously, Thimbleanna, the most shuttles you would ever really need is two shuttles, maybe three. Then maybe two balls of thread should be just fine. I'd start out with size 10 to learn on. Don't be scared off from it! It's very small and portable and I've been tatting for 28 years!!!! That's nearly 3 decades of hoarding tatting stuff. When I started there wasn't the internet. There's so many free lessons and free patterns on the internet that you really don't need to buy books unless you really want to! That's it, it's a very small portable craft. Doesn't take much to do it!
It truly is inexpensive and takes up very little space. I'm just a tatting NUT!!! LOL!

Nermal and Kitty said...

I hope you're not too depressd b/c you don't have any tatting materials. I'm so sorry you had to go OUT and buy more! What suffering to have to endure! My lack of yarn, fabric & paper goods compares to your own lack of tatting supplies. We'll just have to suffer thru it all. sigh. Nerm

***Jon**** said...

Oh dear, how did you ever get into a situation like this. Don't know whether to laugh or cry. You should be more careful next time and not be caught short like that.

I'd be happy to have even a quarter of what you don't have.

TattingChic said...

Thank you, Nerm....sigh...somehow, I'll muddle through.
The funny thing is that when I was dragging everything out of the tatting closet for this post I found those new balls of thread and shuttles still in packages so it quelled my need to run over to the craft store...today...LOL! Thanks for coming by, Nerm!


Yes, Jon, you're right. I've done it all to myself being "underprepared to tat".
But seriously, folks (Jon), keep in mind that this collection spans a time of nearly 3 decades so just give yourself time...it can happen to you, too, if you're not careful...LOL!

Kathy said...

Love the sarcasm. If you are going to be sarcastic, do it right. LOL

That's why I decided not to buy more fabric just because I like it.
Now I have fabric in boxes just waiting for a project. When I find a project, well you know, now I don't have the right fabric. LOL

My tatting supplies at this point consists of 2 plastic shuttles and one metal. I do have a few balls of 80 thread. Yikes! and a few balls of left over crochet thread to practice with. Then there's always the DMC perle that I use on CQ projects. And last a few magazines, no real books just yet.

TattingChic said...

Thanks, Kathy, I'm so glad you liked the Sarcasm. I'm very careful with sarcasm as I don't ever want it to feel attacking to anyone. Some people use sarcasm to be unkind and that's not ever funny!
I think you have a perfectly reasonable tatting stash! With all the free tatting patterns on the internet you can stay busy for quite some time. All you have to do is google tatting patterns and you can get lost in all those links.
Thanks for visiting, today!

Clyde said...

I would say that you are a tatter who is organizing herself so that she is prepared at a moments notice to tat a gift for a special someone. Something I noticed though is that you do need to do some serious shopping as you are completely lacking in Hand Dyed Thread. Being some what of an expert on the topic myself I would be happy to shop with you and offer some guidance in the practical hoarding of HDT and at the same time could add to my stock if I notice it is lacking in any.
I also noticed a severe shortage of wooden shuttles and would recommend a shopping trip immediately before it is noticed by other tatters and causes you unwanted embarrassment. Quick now off to shop.

Natasha Burns said...

LOL I really enjoyed your post today! Thanks for stopping by mine and allowing me to find your fun blog and your incredible creations! WOW!

LOL when I was reading it I kept thinking, oh gosh this is me with all my supplies. Paints, papers, fabrics, millinery flowers, canvases, painting frames, you name it, I have too many but I am always on the lookout for more! So glad I am not alone in my obsession!

TattingChic said...

Oh, Clyde, yes, I think your advice would be well taken...maybe you could show us ALL how to the secrets of practical HDT hoarding...starting with a post on your blog? (hint, hint, hint)...LOL
Yes, I think a shopping spree for wooden shuttles and HDT's is in order...all in due time.

Natasha Burns, I'm so glad you stopped by. It's good to know we're not alone in our crafting stash obsessions. I had a feeling I might find a few people out here in blogger-landia who can relate...LOL. Thank you for your comment. Do come back, anytime!

quiltdude said...

What a fun post and how it strikes a chord with me. There's nothing better than buying new supplies for new projects, even when you have a whole room full of the stuff to start off with, a crafting addiction needs to be fed!!

Amy at Bunny Rose Cottage said...

Such a cute post! I totally understand, lol! I have so much stuff, too much stuff! But it is all beautiful and I want to keep all of it! So what is a girl to do?? :)

Hugs,
Amy

TattingChic said...

Hi, Quiltdude, thanks for stopping by... life is hard as a craft-aholic, isn't it? LOL!

Hi Amy, glad you could come visit. Oh, to have a craft room. I would be in heaven, but I'm not sure it would help...my craft closet is rapidly taking over some space in my walk in clothing closet. How can that be???

Tracy said...

LOL! Loved this funny post...And it's just so sad when we have no crafting supplies, isn't it...not a thing to work on...I can so relate ;o) But so wonderful your friend has been so supportive and helpful. Look forward to seeing what you do make her...no matter the color! And hope you get sorted out with reliable wheels very soon. And thanks so much for stopping by my place and going in the gift fun. And for your lovely email--love to hear from you! Happy weekend, my friend ((HUGS))

TattingChic said...

Awww...thanks, Tracy. I appreciate your comment. You have a great weekend, too.

Melissa said...

OH ya you totally do NOT have anything at all!!! I think large amounts of shopping are in order! You know I have the same problem not enough of anything for Tatting, Crazy Quilting and Embroidery not enough lace, fabric, ribbon, floss, thread, needles, books, mags, ideas, projects, designs, shuttles, books, beads, buttons, vintage stuff, OH OH OH and don't for get tea cups and teapots and table cloths and napkins and pretty things!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Constant shopping.....that's all I can think of as the cure....too bad we don't have enough money to buy all the essentials we NEED!!!!!! LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

TattingChic said...

Yes, Melissa, I think you need to tat some edgings for napkins for tea so you must go buy some more!
I just ran to the needlework store to buy the May Piecework Magazine...they had it on hold for me cuz it has tatting in it! I ended up getting 2 balls of thread, 4 shuttles(2 aero's and 2 faux tortoise shell post clovers)and 2 packs of bobbins...like I needed them...OH!!! and they had a tatting book I don't have so of course I had to get it. What am I to do with myself? I guess I'll just have to get tatting! I had a guy friend request a bookmark so some of this is for his project. Isn't that cute a guy asking for a tatted bookmark? I thought it was cute.

Tattycat said...

Thimbelanna, I'll add my comments to TattingChics. Please don't let our tatting obsession scare you off from trying. We are just tatting nuts. It's not a hobby or a craft - it's a way of life as our friend Clyde says. You really do only need one or two shuttles and a bit of thread. You'd be surprised what you can do!

Barb said...

That made me laugh out loud or lol.
I can relate. When it comes to supplies I have nothing and nothing takes up a lot of room.

Thank you for stopping by my blog also. I think my DH is a keeper-hehe.

hugs to you,
Barb

rosechicfriends said...

Thanks for stopping by...and got a chuckle out of your sweet post! Nope, I say you can never have enough stuff when in comes to creating...whether is tatting, crocheting, painting, sewing...nope not enough and NEVER enough room to store it all in let alone organize it all...(Oooops, that me! in the midst of a craft room redo, stuff everywhere and more stuff!!! lol Very cute post!

You have a blessed day..can't wait to see your *White* heart! Do you sell them? or I see maybe swap? OOOOOO I just might get excited!

Lorena

Cathy K said...

Hilarious post! I totally relate, because I have NO fabric, NO threads, NO ribbons, NO lace, NO beads, and NO buttons in my two-room studio. Everything you *think* you see is just the wallpaper I designed, LOL. I love your blog and wanted to say HI and thanks for visiting mine, too! Hugs, Cat

TattingChic said...

Here...here...TattyCat...I'll drink to that...oh, wait, I don't drink...Hmmmmmm.....I'll find something to do with that...I guess I'll just agree with that cuz it's true!

Hi Barb, thanks for visiting and yes, it's amazing how nothing DOES take up a lot of room...LOL! I'm glad hubby is a keeper. Every woman should be so lucky.

Hello Lorena of Rose Chic Friends!
Welcome! I'm so glad you came to visit. What turmoil to have your craft room out of commission for a redo, but I'm sure it'll be so nice when it's all done! I don't sell right now, as it is the heart I tatted today took about 7 hours to tat and it's not huge by any means so it would be pricey because of time. I'm a fast tatter compared to most. A swap may be a possibility, but it's hard to make it comparable with time and effort, but we can definately talk about it. :)

Glad you stopped by, Cathy K. Thanks for you comment! It's so hard with nothing to do anything with, isn't it? LOL!

Sugarplum Cottage said...

I can easily relate, I love to sew and love material. I'll buy at least 2-3 yards of a certain peice that I absolutely have to have, even though I have no idea what I'm gonna make out of it. I have had this addiction for 25 years now, and let me tell you, I'm not getting any better. I've never tatted before, YOu do beautiful work and since your out of thread, patterns, and books stop by and pick me up, if your gonna to the sewing center. Hugs, RoseMarie

Dantatter said...

Oh I can relate to this.
I hardly have any tatting books or patterns - unless you look at 2 of my bookcases!
I hardly have any threads - but where have my couch gone and what do I have in my grandmother's old closet!
I hardly have any shuttles - at least not empty ones that I can use for a new must-try pattern right now!
I am not working on any projects - but what is taking up the space on my coffee table!
And there are not many things on my computer either that have anything to do with tatting.
And I think my brain and mind is all knotty.
It is no good, we have better accumulate some more stuff. ;-)
Thanks for the laugh.

TattingChic said...

Welcome Sugarplum Cottage. Yes, you are in good company here! Oops you should've caught me earlier I already ran my errand to go get more stuff, but I went to the needlework store, no fabric there, so you wouldn't have missed out on much. They only have tons of beautiful yarns and threads and knitting, crochet and tatting books. Oh, it's a wonderful place that store. They all know me by name, too! LOL!

Yes, Dantatter, you sound utterly tattingly poverty stricken. You poor dear, too. It sounds like they should take up donations for both of us! What do you think?

Dantatter said...

ROFLOL is what I say. ;-)

Michaele said...

Oh this post was GREAT! So glad you dropped by my blog- I'm enjoying reading yours! Tatting...how do you keep from going blind? Seriously? The heart is beautiful- and it would look amazing in any of those colors you "don't" have!

TattingChic said...

Glad you liked the joke, Dantatter :)

Michaele, it looks like we're both winners! I bloghopped over to your from Laurie's blog at Charming Designs. Thank you for visiting here today. Come back anytime!

Lavender Lady Annie said...

Oh~ I relate so well to your problem of no supplies. If I could just find the missing sewing notion I could probably finish all these started and planned projects. Maybe I REALLY NEED to make a shopping trip to find that "thing" which is holding up all this progress. The only problem with that is that my dear hubby always asks the dreaded question:
"Where are you going to put it?"
EEEKKK!! I really dislike that question. Its so convicting!!
Thank you for the great laugh this morning!! What a wonderful way to start a Monday!!
Blessings~ Annie

Joy said...

Classic and thorougly enjoyable. Every crafter/stasher should admit it now: you ARE talking about ME (I don't care what your disclaimer says).

TattingChic said...

LOL...Joy, I think I hit a universal nerve here with most crafters...it's been a lot of fun to read everyone's comments. Thanks again for stopping by!

verito90909 said...

Hi, TattingChic, I think the only one missing here was me, you have full quorum on this post. That part of organizing as a hobby was still part of the sarcasm, right? I can tell you it's not just crafts one can never have enough stuff: I don't have enough notebooks to study, the piles on the shelves don't get to the roof; and I have nothing to wear, with the aggravating problem that I have no fabric to make only-God-could-possibly-know-what. What a shame on me... ...now that I see that no one else has the same problem!

TattingChic said...

LOL...yes, Verito, with no one commenting you have been missed.
No, in all seriousness you have been missed, but I knew you had a busy weekend and stuff. Yes, I really do enjoy organizing.

Allison Ann Aller said...

What a totally charming post!
It's a great intro to the world of tatting for this crazy quilter...

TattingChic said...

Ah, Allison Ann Aller, you are smarter than the average bear! You caught on to my evil plan to make an educational post on the materials needed for tatting humorous...I'm so busted!!! LOL.

Liyarra said...

Oh goodness girl - we better start a save TattingChic fund for you and get everyone to donate a little something to get you tatting.......

Love this blog and I am getting a good laugh from your wicked sense of humour.

Thanks for creating a little smile time in my day.

Jenni

TattingChic said...

Jenni, Yes, oh, yes, a "save TattingChic fund" would be DIVINE!!! Yes!!!!
LOL...I'm glad you enjoyed the post and even gladder that you commented. Good to "see" you here!

Mrs. John said...

Oh, this post was so funny... and was a bit of a 'wakeup call' for me! There really is NO reason to be bored or unmotivated, is there?
:)
You did a great job of writing it... and made a motivating post that I have bookmarked!

TattingChic said...

Oh, thank you so much, Mrs. John! It's so good to see you around the tatting world again. I'm glad you liked the post. I wonder how all the baby animals are back at the ranch.

sharada rajan said...

arent you just like me!
Wow! I love your spirit.
Come on! Lets go shopping.

sharada rajan said...

arent you a little like me!
Wow! I like your sarcasm.
Come on! Lets go shopping!!

TattingChic said...

LOL! Thank you, Sharada Rajan. :) Okay, invitation accepted and away we go! Off to go shopping...